5 steps to calm the fire of a sudden desire to buy

1 Jun, 2023

A sudden desire to buy can come up at any time. Day or night. Rain or shine. It often comes along with great excitement and a feeling like, “I’ve gotta do it now or I’ll miss my chance” And then we might imagine ourselves in possession of the item, how fulfilled it will make us, or how we’ll be seen by our peers and strangers when it’s ours. And all of these intense, sudden feelings may just be a sign… to wait.

Let’s take a breath and think it through. And lets ask ourselves if we should actually get it now. It’s likely that the answer is absolutely not. When an urge or a feeling comes up with shocking gusto, unless it is an actual genuine emergency –it’s likely that a little time to relax into the idea, and time to think it through gently, is the absolute best decision.

In our society, where seeing advertisements is often more common than our seeing a tree or a pond, it can be hard to keep ourselves grounded when a perspective new purchase comes up.

Our sensitivity to excitement and our desire for more stuff have gotten off kilter. Things have changed, and we have changed in response. Treating the act of making a purchase flippantly and with little to no respect for what it really is, is changing us in ways that makes true happiness a harder thing to recognize, and to productively seek out and find. We’ve forgotten that it is the smallest feelings and experiences, where the poetry in our life has the opportunity to sing to us. Because the harshness of selling, has drowned that beauty. And so it has made it so much harder for us to recognise, or even desire that gentle and genuine beauty when we see it.

And every little thing that we decide to buy, every little extra purchase we make, not only do they add up, but they change us. They change the way we relate to ‘things’ and what we expect to get from them. And now, misdirected and confused, we’re looking for more within these purchases than they could ever give us. The things that we spend our money on, the things that we let into our home, our space, our mental energy, to take from our earnings –what they actually take from us is massive. Because they stop us from looking for the inspiration and fulfillment that we deserve, in the places that we might be able to get these feeling. And the home (and the stress level) of someone with the tendency towards thoughtless purchases, can easily become out of control, and overwhelmed. There is no grounding, no anchor, no tether. And we deserve peace, and space. So, here are 5 steps to calm the fire of a sudden desire to buy. Let’s take a breath and get into it…

1) Put it on the ‘wish list’ and let it rest there for a bit

When we get that sudden desire to buy, before you commit to anything, set it down! Take the space and the time to let go of any fiery excitement to buy it. When we’re fired up, passionate, excited, and ready to go, there is no way that our greater logistical skills are intact or even at the party. They were not invited. And that’s just not fair. So, before we do anything, set it all down, and let yourself calm down. Give yourself some time between that sudden uncomfortable itch, and wait some time for your logical mind to put it’s 2 cents worth into the idea. And it’s nice to have a designated amount of time. Maybe you wait two weeks. It could be a month. And, truth be told, twenty four hours is a great thing too… You can write this desire on the list, and let it (and yourself) relax. You’re not going to miss anything. Just breathe my friend. You are fabulous without it. 🙂

2) Go exploring in your own lost treasures for things that might be better

When that sudden desire to buy comes calling, it is easy to forget that you might have anything that might just work in the space of this newly discovered desire. So, once you’ve got it on the list, get your creativity going. Imagine there is no option to buy it, even if there is. This step works best if you really commit to the idea that it’s not an option. So, suppose there is absolutely no hope for you to get it. What can you do, or use instead? Now step into your possessions, and rediscover some old gems. Maybe you have something that’s actually better than this fancy new thing that’s getting all the attention. And, the truth is, possessions get more respectable and special the longer they have served us.

3) Remember all the work they’re doing to get you to buy it

So, from that moment you get a look, and become enamoured by this sweet, new fancy, an astounding amount of ‘behind the scenes’ work has been going on to get you here. The science and the business of advertising is conniving and slick, and the work they are doing to get us craving something new, is worth thinking about. Nothing is just a whim or a fancy. It’s hard work getting us to lose our senses or better judgment over this item. Also, take note of the power that the idea of things being ‘on sale’ has over us. If we didn’t actually need the item, and we weren’t intending to buy it before we saw it was on sale, it just doesn’t count as a good deal.

4) Imagine the item in question in 6 months

We’re not buying this item in a perpetual new state. The pretty pictures on the website, of this item looking fresh and new, is not the true picture of our purchase once it’s in our possession. It may be given to you closer to looking like that, but that moment is fleeting. And once the shine and sheen is dusted away by reality and general use, the item will be just a thing. It will take up your space, and hopefully it will be useful after that illogical excitement leaves us. But to give yourself a better chance to make a good decision, picture it after a few wears, or uses. Remind yourself that it is just a thing, before you click buy. Because it’s possible that it could just become something you didn’t need, padding a closet, and hiding away your treasures.

5) If you buy mindfully, you’ll have more money for quality items

It’s easy to get taken away by the item and by the event of a perspective purchase. It’s easy to let it take us. And so we pull the trigger, click the button, make the purchase. And then, it’s over. It’ll be coming in the mail, or it’s in the back seat of our car. The decision is made, and maybe, it’s not quite as perfect as we wanted to believe it might be. And maybe, in our present, personal buying mentality, we see that as ok. Because, likely, we’ll come across something that we like better soon. Maybe next week, maybe on the weekend or in a few months. It will be bright and shiny, and it will call to us…

But, if we change our relationship towards purchases to being a more mindful, and thoughtful event, we’ll have time, and savings to gain. And then when the time is right, we might just find something that might just be more perfect for us, more beautiful, and more appreciated. We deserve to be more discerning in regards to what we decide to make our own. We deserve a curated collection of possessions that we have thoughtfully chosen that can make our life better. And that will last for years. And if we live in this way, we will likely have more money to spend on each of our treasures respectively.

Conclusion

It’s easy to get taken away by a sudden desire to buy. But it’s almost always worth it to take that breath and a moment to decide if this purchase will really serve us in our future.

Thank you again my friend, for your support,

Let’s meet here again next Thursday,

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